Brown, Mandelson, Vauxhall Ampera and a touch of farce

By Steve Orme on Sep 29, 09 08:09 PM

You know, you can wait a long time for a prime minister to come along. Then two turn up at once.
In a hall adjacent to the Labour Party conference both Gordon Brown and, according to that thrusting political commentator Mr Bean, the man who would be king, Peter Mandelson, vied for attention around the soon to be born Vauxhall Ampera.

But only after a moment or two of farce every bit as memorable as Bean's 'good luck Tommy' moment at Goodwood.
As they say in Halewood and Ellesmere Port but hardly ever in Brighton and Hove Actually: "Er, like laa, yis can't ger in here with that. More than me job's worth..."
Security and police officers were keen to keep the Ampera, due to have its veil whipped of by the Lord of Darkness, out of the tent on the grounds that it may have been a cunning plan; a terrorist device disguised as a car that runs without petrol.
My God Darling, Baldrick would have been proud of that one.
One chap even felt the need to take it apart and check. That's one to remember up before the beak: "No y'majesty, I was only taking the hubcaps off to check it wasn't a bomb, like."
He was stopped as part of a totally justified demarcation dispute.
Eventually PMs one and two got their hands on the newest buggy on Electric Avenue.
Mandelson dramatically, and to gasps of astonishment, pulled aside a veil and revealed - A Car. He patted the motor in a fuhrer like fashion on its cheeky little bonnet and said: "This is really important for the UK car industry, the cornerstone of our manufacturing sector."
Horse, bolted, stable door. Rearrange.
Then Gordon stepped forward, paused for dramatic effect and announced: "This is the future."
Ah no, Golden, I think in quality comedy you will find that honour belongs to garlic bread.